She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
