You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
