If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
