I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
