from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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