Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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