I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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