the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
