Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
