i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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