we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
