hotel room ftw
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
we made out on top of his cat.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize