That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
