he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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