i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
