Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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