sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
