he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Randomize
