Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I will pee on everything he values.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
