Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
