soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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