You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
