My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize