i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
