STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
he puts the penis in happiness.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
