He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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