Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
