You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Randomize
