this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
