Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
