that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
