Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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