Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Randomize
