it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
