I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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