i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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