Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
nutella sex= disaster
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
