u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
