He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
