Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Nicole vs. Life
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Randomize