scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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