god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
