yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
