carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
do herpes really smell.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize
