you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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