i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
Randomize