I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
