i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
After tacos, we're chasing women.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
