nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
She's not a foreskin expert like you
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
