WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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